You might not expect divorce rates to climb among older couples, but statistics tell a different story. In fact, divorce among those aged 65 and older has tripled between 1990 and 2021. While the overall divorce rate has been declining, for couples 50 and older, it has doubled since the 1990s.
But what is gray divorce exactly, and how is it different from divorce earlier in a marriage? In this article, we’ll break down what gray divorce is, why it’s on the rise, and what older couples should keep in mind when facing this life-changing decision.
What Is Gray Divorce?
The term “gray divorce” was coined by researchers Susan L. Brown, Ph.D., and Dr. I-Fen Lin, Ph.D., in The Journals of Gerontology. It refers to the increasing number of older married couples—typically 50 and older—who choose to end their marriages. The concept emerged as researchers began noticing an uptick in divorces among baby boomers who had been together for decades. While younger generations are seeing a decline in divorce rates, the gray divorce trend continues to rise.
These divorces are not happening in short-term marriages; they often involve relationships that span 20, 30, or even 40 years. The emotional and financial implications can be vast with such a long shared history. Couples often have more complex assets and retirement plans, and there’s less time to rebuild their finances. Understanding gray divorce and its unique challenges is essential for anyone considering this step later in life.
Why Do People Get Gray Divorce?
Gray divorces happen for a variety of reasons, many of which are unique to the later stages of life. Here are some common causes:
- Empty Nest Syndrome: According to research from the American Psychological Association, empty nest syndrome may contribute to divorce. Once the kids leave for college or move out, many couples are left to reevaluate their relationship. If the bond between spouses was primarily centered around raising children, they may find themselves questioning, “What do we have in common?” Without shared parental responsibilities, a couple may realize they’ve drifted apart.
- Greater Financial Independence: Many women today are more financially independent than in previous generations. This financial security gives older women the freedom to leave unsatisfying marriages. According to the American Psychological Association, greater financial autonomy makes divorce a viable option, even in retirement.
- Increased Life Expectancy: People are living longer, healthier lives. As a result, some older individuals are more willing to pursue personal happiness, even if it means ending a long-term marriage. With potentially decades of life still ahead, they may seek new experiences and relationships.
- Personal Growth and Changing Priorities: Couples may grow in different directions over time. A study published in PLOS ONE revealed that around 40% of older men and women feel they no longer have much in common with their spouses. They may pursue different hobbies, social circles, or career paths, leading to increased separation.
What Are the Financial and Legal Implications of Gray Divorce?
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Estate Planning
A key aspect of gray divorce is updating wills, trusts, and beneficiary designations. Failing to update these documents after a divorce can lead to unintended legal and financial consequences. Consulting an attorney can help avoid such pitfalls.
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Asset Division
Dividing assets in a gray divorce can be emotionally charged. Many couples have built substantial shared wealth, including homes, investment portfolios, and retirement accounts. Moreover, the house often holds sentimental value, making it difficult to sell. Since older couples have less time to rebuild their assets, they must consider how asset division will affect their long-term financial health. A certified financial planner can help strategize the best approach to asset division while maintaining future stability.
More: Can You File a Divorce Without Splitting Assets?
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Prenuptial Agreements
If a prenuptial agreement is in place, it can simplify asset division. However, for those divorcing without a prenup, dividing assets can become a lengthy and contentious process. A prenuptial agreement clearly outlines who gets what, reducing the need for legal intervention. According to a recent Harris Poll, more than half of newly married couples now opt for a prenuptial agreement to safeguard their assets. For older adults considering remarriage after 50, securing a prenuptial agreement is highly recommended.
More: Avoid These 7 Prenup Mistakes with Our Prenuptial Agreement Checklist
How Are Gray Divorce Issues Different?
Gray divorces are often more complicated than those between younger couples because of the longer duration of the marriage and the shared history involved. Here’s why:
- Retirement Accounts and Pensions: Older couples usually accumulate substantial retirement savings. Equitably splitting these assets is crucial, as it can significantly impact each party’s ability to retire comfortably.
- Loss of Health Insurance: A divorce can mean losing access to affordable healthcare if one spouse is covered under the other’s employer-sponsored health plan. This issue becomes even more pressing for those not yet eligible for Medicare.
- Alimony During Retirement: In many gray divorces, one spouse may have spent years out of the workforce to care for the family. As a result, they may be eligible for spousal support. Determining the amount and duration of alimony payments during retirement requires careful consideration.
- Consideration of Adult Children: While minor children may not be a concern, divorcing older parents must consider the impact on their adult children. Issues such as inheritance, family dynamics, and who gets the family home can create tension.
- Relationships with Extended Family: Divorces later in life can strain relationships with grandchildren, in-laws, and long-time family friends. Addressing these emotional ties is just as important as settling legal and financial matters.
Need Help Navigating the Complexities of Gray Divorce? Contact Farber Law Today!
Now that we have answered the question, “What is gray divorce?” it’s clear that while the process can be challenging, it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Whether dealing with asset division, retirement planning, or updating your estate plan, having the right legal guidance is essential. Contact us at (305) 520-9205 to speak to our experienced divorce and family law attorneys in Aventura, Florida. With years of experience navigating gray divorces, we can help protect your interests and set you on a more secure future.
About the Author: Helena Y. Farber is an attorney in Aventura, Florida, whose practice is concentrated on divorce and family law. She can be reached at (305) 520-9205 or via email at hyf@farberlawpa.com.
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